HOLD UP WAIT A MINUTE (X4)

internet fiend chaos machine mathematics mentor (false) unstoppable man with a plan i own nothing material my name is darkness i am the embodiment of darkness i have two dogs named shadow and moonlight they are the beasts that attack my enemies all parties but myself are enemies i am invincible i own three pieces of glass which are not weapons but they should intimidate you i may be lying i never said anywhere that i would be telling the truth i am made of lies my foundations are built on lies i own nothing i live in the darkness my power bill needs to be paid wealth is a scam my house is the shadows i am allergic to the sun i am not a vampire i am not a dracula i am not a monster i am a shadow warrior i am a master of disguise i am a master of stealth and misdirection and sleight of hand and mystery i am a master of basketball i am a master of baseball i am a master of softball i am a comedy genius i am intelligent and wise i live in a cave i have a bug who rests on my shoulder i have dust in my eyes i have sand in my shoes i do not have anything material my finger points i am a concept i am everything i am nothing i am always telling the truth there is nothing to fear when i am in a two mile proximity wolves attack my property regularly i reinforce the fences despite adversity i own a farm and live on a farm the hoover dam is no match for my willpower of steel i have a blade named blood massacre it can kill anything loud sounds will not stop me dogs that bite my leg will not stop me i will yell at them they will cower in fear i am a yeller i am a shouter i am a whisper of death and suffering on the wind and the delicate scent of laundry i always have clean clothes put away in my closet i always fold my clothes my clothes are black and do not reflect sunlight i wear black clothes and black pants i always have pockets i am a human backpack i remember everything i have a photographic memory i do not know how to hold a pencil i use telekinesis to eat food i am immune to peppers and i eat ice i go outside to look at the grass i have dominion over plants people bow before me i always am rested i eat three meals every day i am a force of evil there is nothing that can kill me i am impossible to kill and will live forever i will not die i am eternal and history will know my name will it remember yours?